An Unburdened Passion

An Unburdened Passion

Sunday, February 7, 2021 10:07 am

Olufunke Cole

By Olufunke Cole

There’s this compelling incident that grips my heart whenever I hear about love story. I couldn’t have forgotten this episode in a flash how I had wanted to tap myself into an inferno of lovey-dovey scenes. I must have always believed love at first without the preference of considering the word, “infatuation”. I must have been rigorously made of scintillating feelings probably at first sight. A memory lingers in me anytime I remember an unusual feeling for an opposite sex.

I had gone in for my master’s programme when I met this good looking guy. Well, I hadn’t been so awashed with handsome features because these are niceties I often find difficult to identify until I found myself suffocating under the magnitude of his appearance. His look must have made a captivating impression on me. I hadn’t felt this way, until this dude came along, or could I have been swept away by the scent of his fragrance, or could it have been his accent that tampered with my senses? I really may not be able to explain. But, I was magnetized as soon as he let out the first statement, “hello babe, how are you”? I forgot to realise if I was befitting for that compliment. I must have gushed over his looks.

Sincerely, I cannot identify how handsome a man could be, but, I’m sure that I could decipher it when you are neatly dressed. “Please, can I ask you a few questions?”, he had pleaded. “oh sure, go ahead, please” I had responded. His speech was so politely composed. I took my time to answer his questions as they filed in turns. Yes, he had just secured admission for a Master’s degree programme and needed someone to furnish him with details on hostel accommodation. While we were talking, I noticed that he was a Muslim because the remark of “Alhamdulilah” interjected our conversation. After some time, we left each other.
I was still locked up in my feelings as he moved away hurriedly. He needed to catch up with an official duty.

I returned home only to discover that I had been hypnotised by his appearance. Locked in the comfort of my feelings, I began to feel that unusual sensational perspiration for this “total stranger” . I began to gasp for escape under this intense admiration. Oh, I must have felt extremely heavenly as the conversation raced through my mind like a carcade on a journey mission. I was longing to see his face, again. I must have been trapped in the walls of ecstasy without the conformity to decorum. I fell to the sunken arms of “love” as I had initially expressed. Was I unjustly torturing my emotions? Or was it necessary to saddle the responsibility of quenching the emotions? Needless to suffice that I became a torment to my feelings, I must have hugely been responsible for creating an atmosphere for conversation because I had smiled sheepishly when he approached like a goat being laid on a slaughter slab. Who knows if his physical outlook was responsible for capturing my gaze and rendering me impotent. One night, I thought about our meeting that I was lost in thought.

And all I could remember was that I woke up with a severe headache. Oh boy, an escape route appeared. My female friend came around to congratulate me on my admission and I used that opportunity to narrate my ordeal to her. “haha”, she laughed hysterically. “Toor, is this love, c’mmon, don’t deceive yourself joor, aláìníkan-ánṣe”, she said. She must have thought that I was getting unnecessarily agitated over infatuation. Whether it was genuine or fake, I was not ready to douse the tension of my feelings. Late into the night, my heart designed an effective measure of aspiration for a unifying closeness. By the following week, I had secured accommodation at Henry Carr Hall, a postgraduate hostel. I didn’t see my “new found crush”. I tried checking through my phone to see if I could see him on WhatsApp but couldn’t. I am sure that I might have mistakenly deleted his number while trying to save it. Haaa, such a misfortune!. Bewildered, I made it a point to always wait like 30 minutes at the spot we met before getting on my way to wherever. One fateful day, on a Saturday, my unusual crush called me, I couldn’t have detected if not for the truecaller app on my phone. Oh, he was coming to the school. Quickly, I ran to the bathroom, took my bath, sprayed my Victoria’s secret body mist all over me. I got a nice skimpy gown to adorn my curvaceous shape.

I must have felt the niceties of a warm glossy effect on my person. Alas, he was here and by the time I got outside the hostel, he was sitting comfortably in his car with a smashing gorgeously dressed lady. Ewwww, my hopes were shattered. “Haa, could she just be his younger sister”, I must have prayed. Then, he broke the news, like a volcanic sound, “hello babe, I couldn’t meet up to talk to the the man, but, hey meet my girlfriend”. Ah! sàngbá fọ́! I couldn’t even look into the lady’s face to exchange the pleasantries. Immediately, I caught a cold. Haa, the shivers went down my spine like a Cockerel which couldn’t get a blanket to escape a frightening cold. Eventually, I found my voice, “oh, you are most welcome”. I couldn’t regain consciousness until after a week. I was caught up in a web of emotional disequilibrium.

-Olufunke Cole is a Doctoral student of Department of History, University of Lagos

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