More Than Just a Mum

More Than Just a Mum

Wednesday, March 29, 2017 8:30 am


Grace Essen

By Grace Essen

In the spirit of celebrating mothers all over, as Mothering Sunday was cerebrated just recently – mostly in the UK and Nigeria. I wish to share a piece just to remind mums just how distinguished and indispensable we are. Unfortunately we often don’t feel that way, we undermine our place and our roles, and take ourselves for granted just because the job of a mum doesn’t comes with a pay and job description. I hope this mum’s experience changes all that.

A woman, renewing her driver’s licence, was asked by the woman at Registry to state her occupation.She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.

‘What I mean is, ‘ explained the woman at Registry, ‘do you have a job or are you just a …?’

‘Of course I have a job,’ snapped the woman. ‘I’m a Mum.’

‘We don’t list ‘Mum’ as an occupation, ‘housewife’ covers it,’ said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation.

The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, ‘Official Interrogator’ or ‘City Registrar.’

‘What is your occupation?’ she probed.

What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out.

‘I’m a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.’

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard right.

I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

‘Might I ask,’ said the clerk with new interest, ‘just what you do in your field?’

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply,

‘I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn’t) in the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out).

I’m working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters).

Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities,(any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it).

But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.’

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants — ages 13, 7, and 3.

Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern (crying).

I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than ‘just another Mum.’

*Motherhood!!! What a glorious career! Especially when there’s a title on the door.

Does this make grandmothers ‘Senior Research associates in the field of Child Development and Human Relations’ And great grandmothers ‘Executive Senior Research Associates?’ I think so!!!

I also think it makes Aunts ‘Associate Research Assistants.’

This is to y’all amazing mums… May your troubles be less, your blessing be more, and nothing but happiness come through your door…

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

Grace Essen is an author, speaker and host of Super Mum Makeover workshop. Check out Grace’s blog @Mum2MumAfrica.com You may reach Grace on 08061367203, or via email: [email protected]. Follow her on twitter @GraceEssen, find her on Facebook.


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